Classic Rock and Roll band The Who wrote a song called, "Who are you?" and in the lyrics they ask (repeatedly):
"Well, who are you?
(who are you? who, who, who, who?) I really wanna know
(who are you? who, who, who, who?) Tell me, who are you?
(who are you? who, who, who, who?) 'Cause I really wanna know
(who are you? who, who, who, who?)"
Really? Is this the goal of every woman to find that "perfect" guy so she can "become" what he needs her to be in order to receive his love? If you look at a lot of our classic movies, love is only found when the woman gives up who she is to become something else.
This search for connection with "the one" is so common in fact, some call it a "quest" to find love. But on the flip side, people say, "When you least expect it, love will find you." So, what is this searching and finding really all about? It's about YOU! Why are you so concerned about finding someone else to "complete" you when you don't even know who you are? Why are you so eager to change for the sake of another's love, when you don't even to know the one person you know the most about: YOU!
The Bible shows us how we could avoid this lifestyle of unknowing by "building" our lives on a foundation that will not be eroded away at the whims of others;
24 “Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. 25 And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. 26 And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. 27 And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it.”
Matthew 7:24-27
Here are a few questions to ask yourself so you can get to know you better:
1) Do you feel comfortable in your own skin, with your own thoughts, and with being alone?
Or do you NEED to be with others?
2) Do you have a purpose for your life?
Or are you focused on the happiness of someone else (spouse or significant other, parents, children)?
3) If you knew you had 60 days to live, would you feel regret about the things you didn't do and rush around trying to "live" the rest of your life?
Or would you calmly be with friends and family, cherishing the moments, and living free of regret?
"I alone know the plans I have for you, plans to bring you prosperity and not disaster,
plans to bring about the future you hope for."
Jeremiah 29:11
God "alone" knows the plans He has for you, and they are good plans, not to bring your pain, but to bring you prosperity and the things you "hope for." But what if you don't hope for anything? What if you don't tell God what you want? You'll be tempted to only complain about the things you don't have. I call this, "Driving with the front windshield blacked out and using your rear-view mirror to see where you're going." Without a purpose for your life, you only "survive" it. Without knowing who you are, you are like a house built on shifting sands.
If you feel you are pleasing everyone else in your life, if you have no clue who you are, if you are seeking love "in all the wrong places," stop trying to change yourself and learn to discover who you are, in all your beauty, and live the life you were meant to live-your life to the fullest!