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On Point

Have you ever heard someone say they wish they had more balance in their life? Maybe you've said that or even heard it from a therapist or caring friend. The truth is that we can never have a life where we are balanced, it's impossible. Yep. It's a lie.

When you look at the ballerina in the photo she looks incredibly balanced. But a closer look would reveal her muscles are quaking and shaking with minor adjustments called "counter-balance." She is only able to sustain this position for a moment in time before changing poses. Gravity is pulling at her trying to pull her down and she is countering its effects though making minor adjustments in her muscles. Even her controlled breathing, her elevated chin, and her spinal alignment must all work in sequence systematically adjusting to the weight of her raised leg and arms. This beautiful pose is made even more special when you realize the strength, commitment, and talent needed to accomplish such a position.

In life, we do the same counter-balancing act. We can feel calm one moment and then unsettled the next. We can make choices that result in small insignificant consequences, or can find ourselves falling into an abyss of unbalance with no idea how to get out. Life is about changes and these changes force us to adjust and counter their effects on us and those around us. External (situations in our environment) and Internal (emotional) forces can push or pull us off balance. We can over- and under-react, projecting negativity onto others, and flee in fear brought on by guilt and shame. We can explode in anger or withdraw in silence. At our worst we can even strike out with fists and cutting words that destroy those around us. Like the ballerina, we must learn how to counter-balance the effects of life in a way that prevents extreme reactions.

By our choices we counter-balance situations that need our attention. With the degree of energy necessary to accomplish the task, we subconsciously measure and counter-measure what is required for success. A little problem requires a little energy to solve. A major problem can set us so far off balance we have difficulty finding our way back to a place resembling balance. The degree of counter-balance is beyond our ability much like when the ballerina is learning to dance and falls to the ground. She was unable to correct the imbalance and needed a total reset in order to start over again. There is no shame in learning how to counter life's challenges, but it does take focused intent and commitment to learning a new skill. There's a saying I learned while learning a skill: "Practice does not make perfect...perfect practice does."

If you would like to learn how to counter the imbalances of your life, please contact Encouragers and schedule an appointment with one of our therapists today.

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