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Quietly Present

One of the hardest things to do with a client is to sit still and just be quietly present. Most therapists want to solve problems, apply some new coping skill, or give recommendations for change, but in some situations, there are no solutions, no new skills are applicable, and you can't change the situation at hand. A grieving parent who has lost a child, a client who was just diagnosed with a terminal disease, or an elderly person who is entering into dementia and knows they are slowly losing their mind comes to therapy to cry, to share their sadness, and have someone listen to their pain. Too often we hear the therapist is the only person who will listen to their complaints of discomfort, their regrets, their frustrations, and their anger that this is "not fair." Often, their complaints are about how others are uncaring, insensitive, and say they are "annoying."