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Comings and Goings?

Recently I was at the gym and I overheard a woman expressing her regret about living with her husband for 6 years prior to marrying him, "Instead of celebrating our 9 year anniversary, we'd be celebrating our 15 year anniversary." A man in the group chimed in with his opinion that she shouldn't get married before she was ready and expressed his full endorsement for living together to "see" if it would work out before making a commitment. The room got quiet when I shared that statistically more marriages end in divorce when people live together first. There is a lie being spread that says that “trying on” a relationship is a good thing. “Test the waters first,” people say, or “Check it out.”

Special Needs

"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." 2 Timothy 4:7 We all have needs. We need to be appreciated, accepted, and understood. We need to be able to be authentic and remain safe with people we live, work, and socialize with. We need to be "seen" for all the parts of ourselves: The good, the bad, the beautiful, and the ugly. We need love. I'll say it again, We all have needs. No one person's needs are greater or lesser than the needs of another. So why do we call people with physical or psychological limitations, "Special?" Is it because they take their limitations and MAKE them special, unique, something to be admired? I like to think the answer is a r


"Seeing a fig tree by the road, he went up to it but found nothing on it except leaves. Then he said to it, “May you never bear fruit again!” Immediately the tree withered." Matthew 21: 19 Words are powerful and can cause great harm. Have you ever made a snap judgement, a poor decision, or caused hurt or harm to another without intending to? Of course you have, we all have. We are really good at being really bad. So, if we are filled with regrets for decisions, words, and actions we've made, why is it so hard for us to forgive others? Because, we don't even let ourselves off the hook. We say things like, "I'm my own worst critic," or "I get myself into these bad situations," to explain our

A little Unwell

Matchbox Twenty's music style has been considered pop rock, alternative rock and post-grunge. 2009 marked the year Matchbox Twenty released its hit "Unwell" (see more). For some, these words resinate and ring true to the daily experience of living with Post Traumatic Stress (some drop the "P" because they don't want to be seen as having a "Disorder") . Much like the lyrics imply, no one wants to have the label of a mental health disorder. The chorus expresses how the one who is "a little unwell," lives their life in their heads, projecting onto others their own beliefs about what others are thinking about us and in relationship to us. But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell I know right

The High Life

How has California's Marijuana legalization increased the need for Mental Health Services? Many of the people who come into treatment have what is called a "Co-occurring Diagnosis," which means drugs or alcohol use is part of the problem. What has become a "right" for many is creating a huge problem with the ability of therapists to effectively assist with positive mental health change due to the interference of drugs and alcohol. In the Amplified Bible, Apostle Paul explains how our choices, even when laws permit, may still not be good for us: "All things are legitimate [permissible—and we are free to do anything we please], but not all things are helpful (expedient, profitable, and wholes

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