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Acceptable or Exceptional?


Do you live your life according to what is acceptable? Do you need the approval of your husband, your parents, your employer, friends, or coworkers? Do you know what they expect from you and your rise to their level of expectation? Do you get "fair" report cards from school, "okay" peer reviews on your papers, "pats on the back" for work well done at work, and occasionally get a positive evaluation that leads to a "tolerable" pay increase? Is your being acceptable by others preventing you from living to your best, or allowing you to remain mediocre?

I work with military personnel who have an inner battle raging between who they want to be (exceptional) to who they feel they are trying to be according to someone else's standards (acceptable). They know what it feels like to live an exceptional career as a soldier, airman, marine, or sailor, but once they retire or leave active duty, they just can't seem to "fit" into civilian life of settling for less. They desire more and don't understand why others don't want more for themselves. They can't find others who have a passion and finding one that doesn't reach their high standards leaves them baffled and confused. Their lack of comprehension can result in an irritation that keeps them stalled on reentry to living as a civilian.

What does it mean to live acceptable?

Merriam-Webster defines it as:

1. capable or worthy of being accepted, or

2. welcoming or pleasing, or

3. barely satisfactory or adequate.

This is my definition by reframing MW's definition:

1. Someone else tells me what I'm worth.

2. I have to care about others more than I care about myself.

3. I'm okay settling for mediocrity.

One of the things I do with my veteran clients is I help them develop a gift or a passion that helps them focus and gain hope for a better future. One veteran rediscovered her love for making Christmas wreathes (photo) and Encouragers is helping her by selling her beautiful CUSTOM made wreathes. If you'd like to learn more and would love to help this veteran out, please call Victoria at our office 951-900-4414. All monies you donate are tax exempt as you gift to ECTC and receive the wreathe designed just for you.

Thank you for helping us help those who served our country.

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