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The First Step

Therapy has many approaches and methods to help you get what you want. You may want coping skills, parenting skills, or relationship skills. You may seek understanding into the feelings you feel, and it may provide wisdom in areas where foolish decision making is ruining your life. But, the type of therapy I offer also includes helping you live your dreams.

Everyone wishes their life was different. They may have a fantastic life, marriage, and perfect children, but they wish they were younger, thinner, or had more energy. Those people are few and far in between and hard to find for most of us don't have anything "perfect." Most people have a dream that they wish they could accomplish, "If only..." They look at the challenges and obstacles that prevent them from getting what they want and think it is impossible, impractical, or not really something they want to pursue. So, it never takes root and the dream remains a wish.

Every challenge presents opportunity and in most cases more than one. Your job is to look at all the possibilities and pick which one is more desirable. The problem is, most of us pick the one option that is easiest and will require the least amount of work. Those are not shortcuts to success they are dead ends with limited opportunity. They will take the simple option, reach the dead end and say, "I tried."

The more difficult option has the most potential for growth,

has the most risk, and is the one less often chosen.

The weakhearted will fear the one opportunity that surely will get them to where they want to go, yet they allow fear to hold them back from taking the first step. They fear failure or they may fear success. They may fear who they will have to become in order to attain and retain the dream they pursue. They fear the friends and family they will lose who will not support the change. They fear that they (or others) will not like themselves after they change. They fear the difficulty, the commitment, and the unknown challenges. And they fear that once they have reached their goals they may not be happy with the choice.

Failure is not to be feared, but embraced. Failure is an integral part of success and without challenges that stretch you, there is no learning. A baby doesn't quit walking the first time it falls. The baby continues to get up, fall, get up, fall, get up, and will fail until it has mastered the ability to walk.Take baby-steps as you begin. Contemplate what the dream you seek looks like. Write down the final outcome, how that will benefit you, benefit others. How much money will you make, what type of car will you drive when money is no longer an issue. Is it money you seek or fame? Who will know you and why? What will that feel like? Why do you seek it so much and how will others view you? Who will be part of your dream-team? Will you take any of your friends or family to the top with you or is this a journey you desire on your own? When you start with detailing the end of the story, what you hope it will look like, you can walk back from there and plan out the pathway to getting there.

Success is not found without fear. Success is the reward waiting on the other side of your fear. It takes courage to go after that which you desire and it takes commitment to keep it. Don't let fear keep you from your dreams.

There is nothing to fear, but fear itself.

Winston S. Churchill


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