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The Intentional Life


What does it mean to “live intentional”? Well, I believe it first starts with the truth. The truth of who you are, the truth about the lies you've been told, and the truth about how you constantly apologize for things others have done to you against your will.


I recently read a book call, "Girl, stop apologizing" by contemporary author Rachel Hollis. The book dives into the lies women have been taught and Rachel's idea of how to challenge those lies to find the truth.


I have found that many of the reasons why women (and men) apologize is rooted in their upbringing where they were made responsible and suffered the consequences due to the poor behaviors of others. Victims of abuse get used to apologizing early in life as they attempt to side-step the physical, emotional, and sexual abuse of their abusers. When their childhood abuser is gone, they tend to fall into relationships that are abusive, and the pattern continues. They have not learned to live a life of intention but instead live lives reactive. They wonder why things happen TO them and have no idea how to create a life they desire.


I tell my clients to stop living their life as if they have no choice in the outcome. You have power, you have control, and you have the choice to walk away from the patterns that keep you prisoner. If you are sick-and-tired of being walked on, leave. If you are exhausted being responsible for another's choices, stop. If you are fearful of the unknown, find courage beyond the fear. Being proactive is the first step to becoming intentional. You must contemplate your options. Ask for advice from people who are capable, not your friends or family members who can't even make their own good life choices. Don't go to your broke friends asking financial advice, and don't go to your abuser to ask their advice how to leave. Seek wisdom and therapeutic counseling is a good place to start.




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